It’s my anniversary!
Exactly four years ago, I gave birth to this blog, and we’ve had this weird relationship ever since. I’m always doing this dance between keeping my life private, and over sharing. Between sharing my journey and keeping relationships sacred. This is my medium for telling stories – for reflecting, if you will, and of course it’s most fun to converse with you, my readers! I like hearing your thoughts.
When I started this, I was newly out of an eleven year relationship, relieved, and – now I can say this, having what turned out to be a fling with a younger man who I called “Prince.” I’ve alluded to this many times. Albeit indirectly. This may sound bananas, but that relationship set the tone for what turned into a three and a half year period of sporadic dating – not with him. He moved on and had a baby with woman closer to his age. I’ll stop there. But wait, this guy badgered encouraged me to start the blog. I finally said ok, and came up with ‘My Female Persuasion’ based on a song lyric from a Beyonce’s Run The World.
And the earliest post I wrote outlined a stream of anticipatory thoughts leading up to a woman being penetrated by her new lover for the first time.
I enjoy writing about relationships. And based on what I’ve written, and dialogue we’ve sparked, I’ve gotten tons of messages asking for advice – to my surprise. Since when do boo’d up women want advice from a single woman?
To be honest – I started viewing my dates as “stories” after a while. Like okay, what kind of quirks will he reveal? What kind of lies will he tell? What does he want from me? What would my readers find interesting about him? Will this lead to sex? (99.9% of the time, the answer was a resounding Hayle NO!) Remember the guy who wanted to choke me? Or the creepy dude who lied about his age because younger women (like me) found him unattractive?
This other guy wanted to get married – before we ever saw each other in person! (And we never did, because he couldn’t buy a plane ticket at the time.)
I could tell some tales. Truth be told, I’ve had several people have tolde they miss those funny date night recaps, and getting first hand insight into different types of men (and their fetishes). Oops! It was fun for me too.
I’ve sprinkled in some writing advice, a few updates on my life, and even fitness advice from a celebrity trainer.
I met a beautiful man last year. (Whew! So glad I was patient!) He got the crazy side-eye from me on our first date – and a bit of a lusty eye too! In his words, at this stage, I’m “doing some things I’ve either never done, or haven’t done in a long time.” He’s right. I’ll give examples later. Now, before I go off on a tangent about LB, I’ll say I’m thankful for the process. I learned to get really specific about the kind of partner I needed to grow forward with, while embracing my alone time. Communication and irresistible energy are nice to have, but reciprocity and commitment to one another seal the deal.
I’m thankful that I’ve had so many witnesses and friends to chime in and laugh with me along the way.
Dating stories are few and far between these days. (I did fill you in on my trip to Atlanta with LB though), and I’m still evolving as a writer – sharing stuff like this lately:
- The Good Wife
- Four Downsides to Being Single Long Term
- 5 Unusual Tips for A Successful Long Distance Relationship
Hopefully you’ll hang with me for another four years. There are great things brewing on the horizon that I can’t wait to share!
As always, if there’s a topic you’d like to see covered on the blog, hit me up.