Well, first I wanna address the photo above by stating that I’m not quite 40. (winks!) And I guess in the interest of being politically correct I will say that MILFS (“mother/mom I’d like to Fuck”) are sometimes looking for more in a younger man. Sometimes they find something more unexpectedly. (It happens!)
The topic of dating a younger man is one I (admittedly) think about often, having done it myself. (There!!) But when I went for my annual physical exam last week, I got to thinking again because my doctor broached the subject. The conversation went something like this:
Dr. V: So are you in a serious relationship?
Me: Nope! I’m still single.
Dr. V: Oh! Well — my boyfriend and I are still in love. He thinks it’s over between us, but it’s really not.
Me: (thinking, oh here she goes again about her love life) Well, what would make him think it’s over?
Dr. V: Well, we have a very unhealthy relationship with one another. He’s 22. He lost his mother at the age of two, and I have no children as you know. So we have this very unhealthy mother-son thing going. I’m very stern with him – and he needs that. But, it’s working. And we have to do whatever makes us happy right?
Me: Hmm. Yup. Whatever makes us happy.
At my physical exam a year ago, she glowed about how she met this younger, buff man who she was really attracted to. Showed me a bare-chested pic of him. I was like “Hmph, he looks good! Good for YOU.” She smiled and put her cell phone back in her white coat pocket.
During my recent visit, she told me she was so upset on Christmas Eve because he never texted or called during her night shift at the hospital. He was out drinking with his friends. “But, that happens. Now I’m so happy because he just texted me ten times back to back. I’m manipulating him by not answering.”
So as I’m on the table with right hand tucked behind my head, with hospital gown opened to the front and gaping, she examined my right breast in a kneading, circular motion. She says “You know, you’re a very beautiful woman. You’re independent. You take care of yourself. You look much younger than your age…”
“You should consider dating younger men because as long as you’re having sex with them, and you don’t ask them to pay your bills, they’re happy.”
I thought “HMMMMMM.”
My doctor is an obese Russian woman in her 40′s, dating this buff 20-something year old African-American man. She’s happy. And with all her “black credit cards and Gucci shoes” (her nickname is “Doctor Gucci“ at the hospital where she works nights), she says she can do “whatever the hell” she wants to.” And hell yes. Indeed. It’s her body. Her money. Her life. Her choice.
Aside from her relationship being “unhealthy,” I see nothing wrong with dating younger men. We often make the mistake of thinking we know exactly what the packaging will look and feel like when a compatible partner enters our life. And even if you’re looking for a strictly sexual, or casual relationship – age (as long as the sexual partner is not under-age) is less a factor than personality, character traits, maturity level, and other non-physical factors. It’s highly possible for a 25-year old to be more mature than a 40-year old, despite him having less life experiences. It’s also very possible for a younger man to put it down better in the bedroom. Chemistry and compatibility are key.
Is love (sex is possible too) on the horizon with a younger man on the horizon for me in 2013? Only time will tell, but I always make it a point to recognize and appreciate every gem that enters my life, whether for a season or a lifetime. If that gem is a younger man, I will embrace that! So my doctor ain’t said nothing but a word.
I will elaborate on the benefits of dating younger men in a future post, but in the meantime, here are some examples of beautiful and talented celebrities who are dating or married to younger men:
Shaquille O’neal’s ex-wife Shaunie O’neal is dating model Marlon Yates. She’s 38. He’s 26.
Tichina Arnold married St. Johns men’s basketball assistant coach Rico Hines in August 2012. She’s 43. He’s 10+ years younger.
Also see: Dating A Younger Man: Is It Worth It?
So, what are your thoughts on the subject of dating a man or woman with whom there is a significant (10+ years) age difference?
- Demi Moore Is FINALLY Moving On From Ashton Kutcher…With A Man YOUNGER Than He Is! (perezhilton.com)
- Tichina Arnold on ‘Happily Divorced’, Married Life, & More (blackamericaweb.com)
- Leona Lewis: It’s OK to date younger guys (belfasttelegraph.co.uk)